Thailand… Bangkok (Day 1) Silom is Bangkok’s version of Downtown Brooklyn and me likey!

I could go through the ardous details of the two legged 24 hour NYC to Bangkok, Thailand flight with the freezing yet exhilirating overnight layover in Beijing, China, but we can chew on that later.  I know what you want.  You want “B” and her halo.  You wanna hear how she put a ring on it, or should I say, how she got me to commit so soon.  Let’s jump right into explain her seductive arts, shall we?

Welcome to Thailand!

We finally arrived in Bangkok and we have lost a day and a half from our original arrival time having arrived at about 8pm.  Driving into Bangkok proper, she is for the lack of a better term, unimpressive, for the city is not lit up like a Christmas tree like Vegas or NYC.  A few choice buildings displays video and neon lights but for the most part dim and unexpressive.  That’s why I needed to get to the hostel, drop these bags off and walk the streets.

A hostel, CLT?  Yes, a hostel.  For those of you who either don’t know what this is, please look it up for quick reference.  I would explain now however to much to cover and for the snobs opposed to this concept, I’ll have you know that I have enjoyed many a hostel!  Many hostels, including the one I owned in Brooklyn, give the same, if not better,  clean accommodation, complimentary amenities and wonderful services than most five-star joints.  Plus you can’t beat the price!  But don’t get it twisted either, I’m good for a five-star or specialty hotel that gets it!  I guess you can say, I’m a woman who appreciates both extremes.  Plus, since the layover in Beijing made us miss a day, my booking of two days at $50 and get a third day free, was not done in vain.  This was for a deluxe room with a queen sized bed and private bathroom.  I looked at it as $33 a day, which is a lot for Thailand, but note when you’re travelling alone,  dorm rates are as low as $10 USD.  I felt validated for the layover actually exposed us to the realities of China for a minute, we were fed well and put up by Air China in a decent hotel.  Win/win all around.

Sala Daeng Station, Silom

John, one of my China layover buddies asked me, “Why did you book downtown?”  The honest answer is that I looked at the map of Bangkok and tried to pick a center point to which I’d have access to everything.  When we got there I understood what he meant, it wasn’t in the middle of all the temples, but surprisingly I was happy about my choice.  Downtown Silom is Bangkok’s version of Downtown Brooklyn and me likey!  Highly commercial, lots of banks and business centers, Mickey D’s, Starbucks, lots of traffic, but more importantly a major hub for both the MRT subway and the Skytrain at “Sala Daeng/Silom”  Chaos, confusion, busy, crowded, just real.  I felt comfortable instantly.

Sidekick Reference- I had a sidekick on this trip and he’s name is Michael or as I will lovingly refer to him, “the Ugly American.”  Always unaware of his surroundings, bad at both street directions and following any type of direction, loud, nutso when insecure about an unknown location or  situation, needs Xanax for any plane ride, I could go on and on, Mike is the worse traveller I know.  Mike was struggling as he always does with change.  Any change.  We are total complete opposites when it comes to travel.  So why do I take him along?  Because with the various shaneagans that he exposes himself to, or should I say us to, I have had some of the most gratifying and horrifying experiences during my travels with him.  His daily goings on would make excellent reality television.   But he has survived a lot of unruly circumstances, so I figure, God and luck are on his side and in travel you need as much of both as you can get.

Bangkok or Brooklyn?

Checked in to HQ hostel and ran into the streets.  Free at last!  We started to walk feverishly to get a hold of the sounds and the smells.  I also tried to take in all the reference points I could, all the easily identifiable markers that would guide me from the train station back to the hostel.  I can’t follow the building and house numbers for they are not in order.  Bangkok addresses are written like this: 5/3-4 Soi Silom 3, (this is the address of our hostel).  I could go into explaining what all this means, but to be honest, it has been explained to me a couple of times and I still haven’t gotten it.  All I know the moment someone explains that the building numbers are given according to when the building was erected as opposed to any type of numerical order, my eyes start to glaze over in defeat.  This is like Brooklyn for, point blank, the streets need to be memorized.  This will take time.  I accept this fact and we continue to forge ahead.

Thai Food Stall

Our mission was to have our first meal on the streets immediately.  I read enough guidebooks and had done enough research to know that it was not only safe to eat from the street, it was highly recommended as opposed to finding a restaurant and being secluded from what was going on.  No, we walked until we saw a street food stall full of Thais, slurping down brothy mixtures of chicken, noodles, bamboo shoots and herbs.  All Thais doctor up their food with extra condiments such as spicy, chili sauce, fish sauce, even more dry chili peppers, and sugar that are offered on every table or takeaway pouch.  I squeal with delight at the sight of spicy, hot food.  I am a decendant of Bahamian people who chew on hot peppers, seeds and all with no fuss.  For me, I like everything Africa hot.  For “the Ugly American,” the fear of heartburn and heat loomed like a rain cloud ready to storm but surprisingly, he was just as excited as I was.  We plopped down on plastic chairs street side and started to engage in the local fare.

A classic tuk-tuk!

Street side eating  is a matter of trust and hope.  You are literally, in many cases, sitting in oncoming traffic, holding on to a skewer or spoon, nearly sideswiped by buses, taxis, motorcycles and tuk-tuks, which are the cutest motorized version of a rickshaw.  They are fast, convenient and sometimes the quickest way to get from point to point within a neighborhood.  But even these little buggers will give you some elbow room from your table when they see you enjoying a bowl of liquid pleasure.  Thais are polite and gracious.  They understand what it is a enjoy your food.  This is a culture that eats 6-8 times a day and hardly no one is obese.  The key?  Three pork satays while walking, then 2 hours later a bowl of Pad Thai there, then you walk to your spot, and so on, and so on.

While sitting and eating happily , my eyes devour the rows upon rows of massage parlors in Silom.  Most in my opinion supply both legitimate services and the famous “happy ending” scenario.  While the front of all the places show row after row of people getting their feet rubbed, there are hidden rooms and sections that can accomodate any pleasure requested.  Most open 8am til 2 am.  Most are clean enough, you really don’t see filth like you do in NYC, so you are encourged to engage.  No appointment needed.  Your average no fuss Thai massage cost 250Baht= $7.50 USD for an hour foot rub, thai massage, head massage, you name it.  Keep in mind this is at the no frills place along the street.  Thailand houses a plethora of spa options for every type of person.  Thailand is the birthplace of the spa concept, so I plan to engage in every tier of the healing arts.  There’s even a 5 story mall dedicated to spa and beauty services and products!  I’m in heaven.

After we eat, I elect to engage in a 2 hour oil massage which cost me a paltry 450 Baht= $13.50 USD.  My therapist is an older, experienced woman, who was pretty good at her craft.  My only complaint was that the place was FREZZING!  When you’re butt naked on the table and it feels like 12 degrees in your room, it’s difficult to really enjoy the service.  I let her know about my discomfort but since we are cornered off by a door but the ceiling is exposed to the rest of the space, there wasn’t much she could do.  “Tourists like cold” she says shaking her head as if saying what I was thinking, “What pussies!!!”  It’s January, in Bangkok, it was only 82 degrees outside.  Just like I said about the food, “I love it HOT!”  “The Ugly American” is off in his corner getting his feet rubbed.  I say to him, “Hey, do your thang, you know, that happy ending thing guys talk about all the time.” he looked at me horrified as if to say, ” I’m not going to do that” and I say ” Dude have your fun… hey, do you want me to pick her out for you?”  At that point, he was through with me.  It this point, you must be thinking, CLT, what is that about?  My answer to you is that I have a liberal attitude about physical acts when done safely, period.  For me, relationships are all about where the loyalties lie.  It is the intimacies of a relationship, a commitment of minds that I’m more into but we can get into that another time.   Me and the “Ugly American” are friends so it should’nt have been a big deal anyway.   My concerns for “The Ugly American” were more practical than emotional.  Just be smart.  Cover it up or even better, pull a Bill Clinton.  Observe body cavities, oral and otherwise, check for anything funny.  I giggle cause when confronted he’s sheepish and embarrassed but I’m no fool, cause if I WASN’T there…

Satay on a stick!

After our lovely treatments, we sunder back to the hostel, bumping into satay stalls along the way, sticking as many hunks of tender dark meat into our mouths (forgive the pun), savoring that thin, sweet top layer of skin first, as we can.  We go into the local 7/11, which by the way is EVERYWHERE in Bangkok, to buy some spirits only to be told that we are past the curfew for alcohol.  It was like 1am and we were still drunk off the massages and had the “itis” from all the satays.  I forgot that Thailand has some limits (though quite reasonable) and is still a religious place.  We accept this fact, load up and some needed liters of water and stagger home into a satay induced coma.  Tomorrow- Monks, temples, scams, oh my!

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